Will Hathaway: How Do I Stop Masturbating

By Jocelyn Hu

The struggle with masturbation and porn is that these are addictions that often grow in secret and are fueled by shame.  The normal tendency for people is to also try to conquer the addictions in secret so that nobody ever knows there was a problem there to begin with.  Thus giving victory over what they know is a problem but saving them the embarrassment of anyone ever knowing.  Frustration mounts as the tactic is often to plead with God to take away these desires and when He doesn't, the spiral continues. 

The fact is, in order to beat any addiction, the question must eventually be asked, "Do I want victory more than I want to not be embarrassed?"  If saving face is the most important thing in your life, then victory will be very difficult to attain.  I'm not sure it is fair of us to ask God to take away sexual desires since He is the one who gave them to us to in the first place.  Sex like fire is good in the right situation, but also like fire, when taken out of the proper setting can destroy everything in your life, including your family. 

The question now becomes, in my heart of hearts, how badly do I want to stop engaging in unhealthy and destructive activities?  When we want it enough, we will begin to take the steps we need to take to win.  We will confide in that friend, we will talk to that pastor, we will seek out that counselor, we will set up the roadblocks.  It is almost impossible to set up roadblocks that we can't get past if we really want to get past them.  Road blocks aren't there to keep us from what we want, they are there to keep us from what we don't want.  If I really don't want something like masturbation to rule an area of my life, then I will set up the needed barriers in my particular life that will help me to succeed.  If we set up barriers that we know ahead of time that we are going to try to get around then we are simply kidding ourselves and playing games with not only God but ourselves as well. 

Interestingly, sexual addictions like many other addictions tend to be very affected by stress.  The more stress in our lives the more we tend to turn to these things to escape reality.  One of my favorite activities is backpacking.  I find that when I'm out in nature away from cell signal and the stresses of the world that I have very little problem with almost all of my bad habits.  I would encourage you that as you battle whatever issues haunt you that you also lean very strongly on those good and healthy activities in your life that relieve stress for you.  Also remember that when it comes to sexual issues, 70 to 80 percent of all men can relate to your struggle.  We are all in this together so you're not alone, even when you feel you are.  Let's do this! 

Will Hathaway is an Ordained Minister, Author, and served in Law Enforcement as a SWAT Negotiator. 

He can be contacted through his website: will-hathaway.com

@2013 xxxchurch.com

 

Related Ariticles:

Josiah's Story: How Parents Talk With Teenage Son of Their Masturbatory Problem 

Helpful to Your Future Spouse' Sexual Struggles: Going into Marriage with Eyes Wide Open 

Recovery from Abusive Childhood: Being Open Takes Time 

Learn to Help and Protect Our Daughter - "He Made me do Things I Didn't Want to do!" 

XXX Church: Porn Is Dehumanizing 

Dad: Have you ever seen something bad online? 

Being Open Is: Knowing How to Have Deeper Relationships 

"UnChristian" Helps Him Out of Double-life in Christianity - Ex-porn Addict Mitch's Story 

Ex-Drug and Porn Addict Dave's Story 

Kate's Story: to Be A prostitute to Survive  

Isatel's Story: I Lived a Double Life 

Ex-stripper Nikko's Story 

Ex-stripper Heather Learned to Compliance  

Stephanie's Story: This Too Shall Pass 

Former Stripper Melanie's Story 

Laurie's Story 

Ahnee's Story: I Was a Real Bad Girl 

Sex-&-drugs-&-rock-n-roll Girl Dee's Story 

Former Porn Addict Sandra Became a Worship Leader 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tags
sexual addiction, masturbation,